The Alchemist

 

 

It was a bright, sunny morning when Dagger Ard, goblin and a senior clerk of the Kingdoms National Bank stepped out of the door of the inn where had spent the previous night. He had slept well and was feeling very relaxed as he headed down the main street of the town of Sow in the Kingdom of the Jagged Moon. It was mid morning and being the weekend, the street was full of folk busy shopping or on their way to visit relatives and friends.

 

But Dagger Ard wasn’t interested in shopping and he didn’t have any relatives in Sow. He instead headed out of town as he was on his way to see an alchemist. Now few towns ever allow alchemists to operate inside them. This is because alchemy is a very dangerous occupation. Unlike magic which can be well controlled, alchemists work with chemicals that can be highly unstable. In fact, being an alchemist is considered the riskiest occupation in Kingdoms, more so than even a dragon hunter. In other words they quite often blew themselves up in their experiments.

 

Now you might be asking why a senior clerk of the Kingdoms National Bank was going to see an alchemist? It might be because the alchemist wanted to open a savings account or apply for a loan and wanted that personal touch from the bank. Happily the reason isn’t either of these, otherwise the story would have been quite boring indeed.

 

Shortly Dagger Ard left behind the last houses bordering the town and was walking along a narrow country lane. Tall poplar trees edged it and beyond them were fields of wheat and corn and peacefully grazing cows and sheep.

 

The air was crisp and fresh and for a while he enjoyed the smells of the countryside. But after about an hour or so he started to smell a different odour. It was a very unpleasant one, a strange mixture of metals and chemicals that was faint at first, but grew stronger the further he walked. The trees began to look sickly, their branches drooping and the fields turned bare and dusty.

 

Then Dagger Ard rounded a sharp bend in the lane and ahead could see a closed gate. Beyond it was a small cottage with a large barn to one side. The barn had a large brick chimney and from it poured a stream of acrid grey smoke.

 

By now he had taken out a handkerchief from his pocket and placed it over his mouth and nose. The foul chemical smell was almost overpowering now and it would have made most people ill. But Dagger Ard had visited quite a few alchemists over the years and had grown a little used to the smells their experiments produced.

 

He pushed open the gate and rather than going up to the house, went up to the barn. A door was open and he stepped through it.

 

Inside the smell of chemicals was dreadful and Dagger Ard’s eyes began to water a bit. It was very warm too, the heat coming from a huge brick oven on his right that was covered in grime. The wall to the left was taken up entirely of shelving where a huge array of containers sat. There were glass bottles filled with different coloured chemicals, some that fizzed, some that gurgled and some that pulsed and shimmered. On the floor were metal tubs filled with minerals and ores like coal, iron and copper to name a few.

 

And against the wall at the back of the barn stood work benches covered with alchemy equipment. There were small burners sitting under large glass beakers heating chemical mixtures of some kind. There were test tubes connected to rubber tubes, which went into other test tubes and tall, thin beakers. In all of them chemicals frothed and popped in whatever experiment was being conducted at the moment.

 

The alchemist himself was bent over a large book on a bench and hadn’t noticed Dagger Ard, too immersed in whatever he was reading. He was wearing a large black rubber apron and next to the book was a pair of black rubber gloves.

 

Dagger Ard gave a small cough, half out of the stench in the air and half to attract attention to himself. The alchemist looked around sharply and quick suspicion flickered in his red-rimmed eyes.

 

‘Who are you?’ he asked.

 

‘Dagger Ard’s my name… from the Kingdom’s National Bank. You must be the alchemist, Cadmus.’

 

A slow smile crept across the alchemist’s face and he nodded.

 

‘Yes, I am,’ he replied. ‘I suppose you want to have a talk.’

 

‘If you have the time, or I could come back when it’s convenient,’ Dagger Ard replied.

 

‘No, I was expecting you at some stage and we might as well get this over and done with,’ Cadmus said. ‘We’ll go over to the house.’

 

The alchemist led Dagger Ard out of the barn and to the rear of the house. They entered the kitchen and Cadmus waved him into a seat at the kitchen table.

 

‘Cup of tea?’ he asked.

 

‘Please,’ Dagger Ard replied.

 

‘When did you arrive in Sow?’ Cadmus asked as he picked up a simmering kettle of water from the stove.

 

‘Last night. It’s a nice town, very pleasant.’

 

‘It will be even nicer when they have some extra money in their pockets,’ Cadmus replied as he spooned some tea into a pot and poured in the hot water.

 

Dagger Ard didn’t reply to that and they both waited in easy silence as the tea brewed. Then Cadmus poured two cups and Dagger Ard helped himself to some milk and sugar on the table. He took a sip and then spoke.

 

‘Now, it has come to the attention of the bank that you have discovered a way to turn lead into gold,’ he said.

 

Cadmus nodded.

 

‘I have. As I said, I was expecting you lot at some stage, but how did you find out? I haven’t told anyone yet.’

 

‘Oh, the bank has it means,’ Dagger Ard replied. ‘We would like to know what you plan to do with your discovery.’

 

‘I mean to make gold for anyone who wants it,’ Cadmus replied in a challenging tone.

 

‘Mmm… well as you can imagine that will put the Kingdoms National Bank in an awkward position,’ Dagger Ard said. ‘A discovery of this magnitude would make real gold worthless.’

 

‘A worth that your bank sets,’ Cadmus said accusingly.

 

‘That is quite true,’ Dagger Ard admitted. ‘But consider how many kingdom’s you would ruin whose economies rely on gold coin, not to mention putting several thousand dwarves out of business.’

 

‘The dwarves can always mine something else,’ Cadmus replied a little unkindly.

 

‘So you’re not concerned with the calamity your discovery would cause?’

 

Cadmus grinned.

 

‘Not when I’ll be famous as the alchemist who discovered how to turn lead into gold.’

 

Dagger Ard pursed his lips, not really enjoying what he would have to do next. He knew how much time and effort alchemists put into their work and he didn’t like seeing hard work go to waste. But business was business and opening a satchel he was carrying, took out several documents.

 

‘Has it ever crossed your mind why, after thousands of years, no alchemist in all of Kingdoms has ever discovered the secret of turning lead into gold?’ he asked.

 

Cadmus’ eyes narrowed and he glanced at the documents.

 

‘Perhaps they just haven’t been smart enough,’ he replied, though there was a nervous edge to his voice.

 

Dagger Ard pushed the first document across the table.

 

‘Well, there is this method,’ he said.

 

Cadmus picked up the document and as he read it his hands began to shake slightly.

 

‘And this one.’

 

Cadmus’ hands were shaking even more as he read the second document and his face had gone very pale.

 

‘And of course there is this method,’ Dagger Ard said, sliding over the last document.

 

Cadmus put down the second document but didn’t pick up the third.

 

‘I… I don’t believe it!’ he muttered in a strangled tone.

 

‘But you do agree that the methods described in these documents would change lead into gold?’ Dagger Ard asked.

 

Cadmus managed a nod.

 

‘But… but if the bank has known about these methods… why, you could make as much gold as you wanted!’

 

‘Yes, we could,’ Dagger Ard replied. ‘But the bank likes gold being dug out of the ground. That way its value stays quite stable, keeps the economies of kingdom’s nice and healthy and of course makes dwarves very happy.’

 

‘I’m ruined!’ Cadmus exclaimed in a stricken tone. ‘I’ve poured everything I had into my discovery!’

 

Dagger Ard patted the distraught alchemist on an arm.

 

‘Nonsense, dear fellow,’ he said. ‘The Kingdom’s National Bank isn’t about to stop you making a bit of gold… as long as it’s just for yourself.’

 

Cadmus gave a start.

 

‘It’s not?’

 

‘Perish the thought! You’re not the first and certainly won’t be the last alchemist who has had to swallow a bit of pride. The bank’s policy is very clear in this regard. You can make enough gold to keep yourself in a sound financial position… provided you keep it a secret and in turn work for us.’

 

Cadmus frowned with suspicion.

 

‘Doing what?’

 

‘Well, the bank likes to keep ahead of these types of discoveries,’ Dagger Ard replied. ‘At the moment we are very interested in whether tin can be turned into silver. The bank would like you to work on it and see what you can come up with.’

 

A grin slowly crept across the alchemist’s face.

 

‘That would be quite a challenge,’ he replied.

 

‘Good, then that’s all settled then,’ Dagger Ard smiled, glad to end business on a happy note.